Unexpected Summer Losses

In mid-July, I was in a car accident. I was the 4th and final car hit in an intersection accident. I was in a left turn lane behind another car. After the light turned green, an elderly woman coming the other way, ran the red light and t-boned the sedan in the intersection which spun and hit the car in front of me which was pushed into my front end. I immediately picked up my phone and called 911. I knew people weren’t going to walk away. Both women in the initial collision were taken away by ambulance. In the meantime, my insurance company has been hideous! I got more information from the tow yard! After a month, it’s now established that my vehicle will be repaired, and I’m seeing a chiropractor. When all of this is said and done, I’ll be changing insurance companies.

Just when I thought I would peacefully transition back into my job at the start of August, another tragedy hit. My ex-husband died suddenly. We don’t have the final autopsy results yet, but based on his health history, it’s most likely a heart attack. He was 61. I can still hear our kid’s sobbing over the phone as she could barely get the words out, “It’s Dad. Dad’s dead.” Saying he was my ex doesn’t cover our relationship. I met him 40 years ago when I was 18 years old. We married within a year, had a child together 4 years later. We eventually grew in different directions and went our separate ways 16 years later. We maintained joint custody and lived only 3 blocks apart to make things as easy as possible for our kid. We committed to never turning her into a battle field, co-parented well together, and remained friends. Over these past 24 years, we emailed and talk on the phone every few months. The last time I called to wish him a happy birthday back in June. We spoke for two hours.

My kid and I flew from where each of us live to the small town he lived in. We had a small memorial service and started cleaning out his place. The biggest thing was that I helped walk her through the initial legal matters and will be handling his bills. She’ll return in 10 days with friends to finish cleaning out his apartment. His cat is currently with a local friend of his, but will be moving in with our kid and her cat. We’re both just starting the grieving process. I’m already planning to spend the holidays with my kid. He’s being cremated, and his ashes are being sent to me. I live in Colorado, a state he truly loved. We know he would rather be here, and will look into our options for something to do together to honor him next summer.

I don’t know what the hell has been in air, but I am exhausted! Especially that the summer began with losing a student to gun violence, at this point, I am so done with this summer!!!

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